googlism

so i went to googlism.com and did a search on my name. my ten favorites?

1. patrick is a god (well, DUH)

2. patrick is inserting his dick into the hairy pussy of the asian prostitute (they got that wrong, i was doing that last week)

3. patrick is still waking up (whoa, i ran the googlism search right after i woke up! it’s psychic!)

4. patrick is the constant butt of jokes because of his irish ancestry (true, but not about his irish ancestry. though there are people who call me “patty.” fuckers)

5. patrick is ready to drop his hot sperm on the abdomen of liza (odd, it’s not always hot)

6. patrick is left alone with his uncontrollable bottom burps (does that mean i fart a lot? if so, THEY’RE RIGHT!)

7. patrick is delighted to announce that he will now be represented by cloud moss of cumulus presents (now i have to change my business cards)

8. patrick is een internationaal bekende spirituele heler die in elke helingsessie het lichaam (have no idea what it means but maybe it says ‘patrick is the one who farts the mightiest of farts’ in german)

9. patrick is horrified to learn he doesn’t have the best one (after learning about mr. big, my 8″ penis feels so…small)

10. patrick is buried (i’m writing this from the grave…scaaarrrryyyy)

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